I don’t feel funny today. I felt funny a few days ago but it turned out to be only a lightweight viral attack within my Waldeyer’s Ring, which on the back of the throat is an infection bullseye.

I know this because my Primary Care Giver Assigned by Insurance, who is also an M.D., gives me cool names for stuff, like the place in your nose where nosebleeds usually start. He said that is called “Kieselbach’s Area.” How many people know this besides him, me, and now you? I know, I know, most people wouldn’t want to know, etc. But I think it’s a very cool thing to know.

And that bunion joint on your foot is the metatarsophalangeal joint. Beautiful! I discovered that on my own.

That’s the kind of day it’s been. I’ll look in on you again tomorrow. Get some rest and drink lots of liquids, preferably Belgian beer.

Tomorrow has dawned foggy and chilly. You call this a summer? I guess it’s more comfortable than the other coast (East), where it’s been hot as . . . it was last summer, with humidity.

Nope. Nothing humorous is surfacing. Later, gator . . . or as we speak in this part of the USA, “mas tarde, amigo. . .”

AND FINALLY: Still not funny, but I think I found the solution: I plan to quit writing this column. Enough’s enough. (

If you insist I continue, I will. Write a comment. If I get more than one comment (the usual guy), I’ll carry on. But you won’t write. You’re as lazy as I am.